(Day 14) 28th March - Women in Work and Leadership and PMS // Part 1: Crying

 Now, thinking about women in work and the topics surrounding it is very broad. However, topics such as menstrual cycles and how a period can impact work life for some feels like a taboo subject. Even me, writing it now, that I am coming on my period feels like too much information (TMI). This stems from years shaming periods and keeping it secret, but when it comes into the workplace sometimes its hard to ignore. This is because it may mean a stronger EQ is needed to help understand and control the different or more sensitive emotional state. On the lead up to my period I will be paying extra focus to my body and mind and how it may influence my work or team work for uni. As mentioned in my last blog, the 26th March, my PMS (Premenstrual Syndrome) made me more sensitive to a situation at work. Therefore, I wanted to look into women's emotion in work, leadership and design as whole. Whilst there is many, MANY, topics involved in this, such as the underrepresentation of women in managerial roles as well as non-white designers, I am focusing on the highlighted topics above (for now!). 

Now, I do not speak for all women but I know many feel reserved about being emotional or talking about periods especially in the work place. Whilst yes it is private, some women may have uncontrollable affects due to this. Jeneva Patterson (2018) opens her article 'Why Is Crying at Work Such a Big Deal?' with the following summary "Crying is a natural act for both sexes, yet most corporate cultures, built and directed by men, are inconsistent in the way people react to crying. For women, crying at work can be professional suicide, while for men, however, it is often applauded as an act of bravery. Since women cry far more often than men, it’s pretty certain that many a promising female manager has had her career derailed by a crying episode. If company leaders are serious about inclusivity, these cultural attitudes to crying must change. Regardless of gender, leaders need to be trained on how to normalize crying as another form of emotional expression. And for their part, women who cry must not be afraid to own their tears."

This really made me think. Now, I love a good cry, I think it's healthy, a release and as Patterson, J (2018) said a form of emotional expression. In my personal life I am very open about my crying, yet after crying at work I felt embarrassed and I was worried about the other colleagues finding out. But, why? I am do own my tears, but when it came to the work place I felt different. Majority of corporate cultures and managerial roles are held and created by men, therefore this natural influences the cultural attitude. I guarantee in more modern, or female based cultural, the employees would feel generally open about crying, periods and emotions. It is interesting to note that then author highlights how men typically benefit from crying at work and women are told to 'pull it together'. Patterson, J (2018) writes "An organisation's culture is most often established, normalised, and reinforced by its leaders. Leaders are most effective when they show vulnerability and acknowledge their mistakes". The author offers tips if you do cry or if someone on your teams cries.

If you cry:

- Own the tears, as if you aren't embarrassed most likely others too won't be embarrassed. Take a breath and talk. Maybe a sentence like "as you can see I feel quite emotional about this".

- Laugh, making yourself and others more comfortable. Something like "I guess you can see I'm coming on or feel strongly about this" may be fitting for me. 

- If tears turn to sobs, excuse yourself. Leave the room and gather yourself, return to the group and acknowledge the tears, talk about it and be transparent then relate to above points.

If your a leader and someone on your team cries:

- Be open, acknowledge crying is natural and a process. This normalises crying and highlights it is a healthy behaviour. 

- Be relatable and share own experiences with emotion at work. Model that being vulnerable is okay, this also has a positive impact on trust and safety. 

Now, naturally as women are more emotional and cry more, there has been more articles and research debating if women make better leaders. This is also backed by the current worldwide Coronavirus crisis, and how women leaders dealt with the pandemic. 

Wittenber-Cox, A (2021) writes abut the ongoing women leaders who outperform within companies and countries led by women are handling the COVID-19 crisis better than male leaders. the author asked why isn't this being highlighted more or celebrated? This is because 'only half of the world is listening' which is 'public vs private' sector. "From Iceland to Taiwan and from Germany to New Zealand, women are stepping up to show the world how to manage a messy patch for our human family" (Wittenber-Cox, 2020). The 2020 article "What Do Countries With The Best Coronavirus Responses Have In Common? Women Leaders" is backed by evidence and statistics, catoerigsing the womens moves as truth, decisiveness, tech and love. Linked within is '7 Leadership Lessons Men Can Learn from Women'. Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic and City Gallop (2020) again highlight that majority of 'power' positions are held by men, but 'studies show that is is actually women who have what it takes to effectively lead'. 

1. Don't lean in when you've got nothing to lean in about. 

2. Know your own limitations. 

3. Motivate through transformation.

4. Put your people ahead of yourself.

5. Don't command; empathise.

6. Focus on elevating others.

7. Don't say you're humbled. Be humble. 

In comparison to the public sector vs the private sector, the 'overwhelmingly bro-cultured tech giants nobody trusts', 'results-driven business sector' or the 'financial world overwhelmingly run by men despite the research pointing out the embarrassingly emotional, testosterone-driven relationship men have with risk' (Wittenber-Cox, 2021). Women fight for purpose, which is why women are beginning to lead the public and non-profit sectors. However, this drive by women is needed in businesses for performance and how they are from users. 

Key traits identified with effective leadership such as "humility, self-awareness, self-control, moral sensitivity, social skills, emotional intelligence, kindness, a prosocial and moral orientation, are all more likely to be found in women than men". Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic (2021) also points out women typically outperform in educational settings too. He argues that women remain a minority within leadership positions as 'we don't really select leaders on the basis of their actual potential, talent, or competence'. 'We live in a sham meritocracy, where we pretend to pick the best person for each job, while simply picking those we prefer: and when the job pays well, they are still overwhelming male'. 

This led me to question so how do women get to the top? Is it going to be a long/longer process or do more women need to become entrepreneurs? 

References:

Chamorro-Premuzic, T (2021) If Women Are Better Leaders, Then Why Are They Not In Charge? Available at: https://www.forbes.com/sites/tomaspremuzic/2021/03/07/if-women-are-better-leaders-then-why-are-they-not-in-charge/?sh=10a8751a6c88 [Accessed March 2021]

Chamorro-Premuzic, T., et al Gallop, C (2021) 7 Leadership Lessons Men Can Learn from Women. Available at: https://hbr.org/2020/04/7-leadership-lessons-men-can-learn-from-women [Accessed March 2021]

Patterson, J (2018) Why Is Crying at Work Such a Big Deal? Available at: https://hbr.org/2018/06/why-is-crying-at-work-such-a-big-deal [Accessed March 2021]

Wittenber-Cox, A (2020) What Do Countries With The Best Coronavirus Responses Have In Common? Women Leaders. Available at: https://www.forbes.com/sites/avivahwittenbergcox/2020/04/13/what-do-countries-with-the-best-coronavirus-reponses-have-in-common-women-leaders/?sh=62470cad3dec [Accessed March 2021]

Wittenber-Cox, A (2021) Data Shows Women Make Better Leaders. Who Cares? Available at: https://www.forbes.com/sites/avivahwittenbergcox/2021/03/06/data-shows-women-make-better-leaders-who-cares/?sh=6ce870b146be [Accessed March 2021]